Running on empty

Insomnia.  Migraines.  Shaking hands.  Irritability.  Achy joints.  Constant itchy sensation on my arms, legs, and torso, sometimes spreading to other parts of my body.

Welcome to my reality.

I am so exhausted.  I get in bed at night and have trouble falling asleep, then I can’t stay asleep.  I probably got a total of about two hours of sleep last night, which was extra fun today when I spent the last two hours of my shift putting ink tags on itty-bitty baby clothes (they tend to just walk out of the store if we don’t).  I kept stabbing myself with the pins.  If you’ve never done it, it’s painful…not to mention that we re-use the tags and they also get transferred from store to store, so who knows what kinds of germs were on them.  Ew.  I took a nap after I got home from work but have felt very sick since then, so I’m not optimistic about getting a good night’s sleep tonight, either.

The good news is that my schedule is pretty much the same from week to week right now–the hours vary a little, but my work days have been the same for the last few weeks and look like they’ll continue to be the same for the next little while, so I’ll be calling my doctor’s office tomorrow morning to schedule an appointment.  I was supposed to follow up with my doctor about this time last month about the dosage change for my antidepressant, buuuuuut I was a little busy getting stuff together to get married and all.  Hopefully I can get into the office soon, especially if I still feel like I do right now.

The other good news is that we had our annual evaluations at work recently.  I was pretty nervous.  I feel like I’m doing well and getting a lot done in the job I’m currently doing, but those months in customer service count too, and I wasn’t meeting management’s goals over there.  Luckily for me, my supervisor in store support was doing my evaluation.  He mentioned that I hadn’t been meeting the expectations the company has for all sales associates (basically, not enough credit apps or online orders for customers in the store), but also said it wasn’t going to really affect my evaluation because I’m no longer considered part of the sales staff.  I got really high marks on everything else in the evaluation: time management, efficiency, accuracy, getting along well with all my coworkers and the managers.  I had a high enough score on my evaluation to end up in the top tier and be named an “all-star”.  Like I’ve said before, I don’t really intend to make a career out of this job, but I came into this job with the intention of completing my assigned tasks to the best of my ability, and so far, it’s paying off.

I have tomorrow off, so I’m going to spend it catching up on housework and laundry.  I think Dallas and I will probably go visit his parents (and the critter crew, as I fondly think of them).  We managed to sneak up on the dogs the other day–they didn’t know we were coming over and didn’t hear us coming up the driveway.  If you’ve never had two otherwise serious senior dogs throw themselves at you while barking, whining, and trying to lick your face all at the same time, you don’t know what you’re missing.  I swear they turn back into puppies, especially Bo, who’s nine years old.  (Gabby, at seven, thinks she’s still a puppy.)  Even when we lived there, they’d act like that if I got home from work late at night.  Now that they don’t see me every day, it takes longer to convince them that I’m not about to just turn around and walk back out the door.  It just makes me feel so loved to have them meet me at the door and demand my immediate attention–yes, all of it.


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